Here it goes for today.
My mood is resolved and it was quite a good day. I was going to be up bright and early to go get my text books, but i ended up staying up til close to 4AM. I called my grandpa's place and said lets not bother getting my books, i want to sleep in. He called and said how about we go around 12 oclock, which was fine. We get there and find the store, ended up being $350 for 4 books. He bought them for me which was a major help. I then had to go get my student card so i can use public transportation. I get to the right place and stand in line.. for close to an hour. I get upto the table and i get the piece of paper i need... then go to the back of the next line to have your picture taken. I waited there for close to another 1:30. It was really slow due to the fact they would take your picture then a machine would make the card. I got my card and got out of there (picture came out horrible, i look grumpy as hell. ill post it sometime). I got home for 5 minutes and right back out the door and i walked my mom to her 2nd job then came home. Its a good hour walk to and from, so i got alot of exercise today.
Right now my mom is talking to people online through a dating site. I can't say i am really pleased with the idea either. She is being cautious and everything, but i wish she would just be able to be happy with the current situation. She is talking to a guy and now they are "exclusive" but its hard to say exactly what that means, she isn't even sure what she agreed to. I don't like the sounds of this guy. He has 3 teenage boys from 13-18. Don't get what i say wrong, but i am a majorly greedy mofo. Im not an attention
barthelago or anything. I like everything to benefit me and i am always trying to further my own agenda, i am a compassionate person but i like my privacy and my space. If other people are around me personally its because i want them there. In this situation i have no control over it. Luckily i am 18 now, so within 4 years ill be out on my own anyway. I do want her to be happy but i feel everything we have will be sacrificed in the process. If things were to go further for me to be part of it i would have to have my own room, my own TV and PC and the such. Ive been used to things a specific way my entire life and i want things to continue as such. I am an indepent person as i don't like to give up control over anything unless i greatly trust you. Chances are things won't go anywhere like normal but i still hate these situations. Every so often things like this happen, if she met a nice single guy i wouldn't have a problem. Back to the part about being a private person. I would find it really difficult having to deal with step siblings due to my nature. Ive never really had to share anything, although generosity is in my nature. I have always been one to benefit the unit collectivly (me and my mom) and i can't see redefining that unit. It seems such a weird idea i don't even want to think about it. It brings me back to a memory i have of being about 8 or so. I was at a public pool and in the change room. I was sitting on this bench and in walks this group of 12 kids or so. Next thing i know they are all ripping off their clothes to change into their swimming gear, i remember that day so vividly for some reason. It reminds me how i could NEVER ever do something like that, now or then. If i have to use a public lockeroom (i will avoid such situations at all cost) i will change in the washroom stalls. To me being in a state of having nothing on is being at your most vulnerable point. I never want to seem vulnerable as i am not really a vulnerable person. I am really strong and opinionated so being in such a state reduces me to my weakest point. That whole speal is also point of the fact i could never share my room with another male. Something about it seems slightly odd to me. I don't view it as homosexual or anything, but after all you have to change somewhere, it should be your room. I can vaguely remember being 8 or so (again) and i had to share a room with a cousin. In the morning he gets up and changes right at the side of the bed, no caution at all. I remember thinking how uncomfortable it made me. It seemed disrespectful as harmless it was. I didn't even know the guy and there he is changing right infront of me. I kinda told myself i am never going to be like that, and here i am.
Just recently a friend named Lisa came back into my life. I have known her for about 5 years now. She is awesome. We have alot of fun when we do hang out, for some reason we lost touch for about 6 months. I hope we can go see a movie or something within the next few weeks. We get along really well, although there is alot of flirting going on. She has been going out with a guy for 2 years now but she doesn't seem that serious about him. He is off somewhere doing a course at some college. She talks to him on the phone but has little contact besides a visit here and there. She has told me before she finds me attractive (dead hint) yet things remain as they are. I hope something will come of it someday, but i don't want to spoil our friendship as we do have alot of fun. One of those things : /
Well tomorrow and its 7 days til i start school. I am really nervous but visiting it today has got me exicted. This should take my knowledge of computers through the roof. People are shocked at my diversity as it is. I was looking at some costs to go to a place like DigiPen for CG design. It was $69,000 in tuition alone for a bachelors degree. Thats really high considering the best university in canada will run you 7k a year in tuition. Our system is setup so that tuition can only increase by 10% a year and every so often it is frozen for a year or two. My tuition is about $4500 per year. In the end you do what you have to do. If it costs me $70,000 thats pretty cheap considering this is my dream. I could be in debt the rest of my life and still be happy considering i did something worth while on my terms, which is all i really want for myself. One school in toronto has a good program for CG design, but again its not a degree program. I am looking towards getting my degree as by the time i am done i would have a couple years experience, which would make for an extremely impressive resume.
Does anyone have any indepth tutorials for newbies to 3d modeling? i don't really care what program, it would be nice to start building a portfolio now and i feel the need to communicate some thoughts into an art form. Feel free to PM any links to me.

Im still working on leveling up in WoW so i can get into PVP action and the Battlegrounds. I am about 25% to level 14. I wish i had of got into the game earlier, but its almost nessicary to try before you buy with this PC. I have a stack of games i can't play or they are unbearable due to this pc.
I wanted to mention a project a friend told me about. 3 developers are working on a game titled Project Offset. Its a FPS based in an epic fantasy world. The main draw to the game is its engine. Its created using a typical cinematic engine. I had ALWAYS wanted to see a game created using a cinematics engine, even though i never knew if it was possible. I had always had a hard time with the parallel a cinematic creates in a game. Lets take FF7 for example. The cinematics are amazing, i can remember being 10 yrs old seeing commercials on TV for the game and being awed. Looking at the actual graphics its an entire different story, it creates a major gap between the cinematic and the game itself. Ingame cut scenes leave you wanting full amazing cinematics even though you know the standard parallel. Its quite funny. Some games address it quite differently and use anime animation clips which fits in much better, aslong as the art style represents the exadurated look of anime.
More news out of GNR. Axl claims that the royalty cheques were not affected by the deal he made, but a clerical error was made and thats why there was the delay. Needless to say there is a November court date, maybe there will be some Axl pictures! Havn't seen any sign of him in a couple years now.
Well i decided to name the journal Beggers and Hangers On. I ripped it directly from an awesome Slash song, the blues slides at the begining are amazing. The vocals aren't that great though. People who like rock music should listen to Slash's Snakepit, but the year 2000 version. The album is amazing (Serial Killer and Something about your Love being my favorites). The vocalist is amazing, i wish he would do a solo CD or something!